Christina Rae Elia

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19 year old student and MUA based in London, England.

Happily single.

All I want in life is road trips and mac and cheese.

Twitter/Instagram: @Nonelikerae

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for popular demand, here it is, 15facts girls should know about guys and 15 facts guys should know about girls.

Things girls should know about guys:

  1. They don’t scratch their balls; it’s more of a pinch and roll.
  2. They will NEVER understand your obsession with candles nor will they care if it’s cinnamon or wild jasmine. You need one when threes a black out, that’s all.
  3. Amazingly, they can not read your mind, just tell the fuck whats wrong.
  4. Never ask “what have you done for me lately” because trust me, he puts up with a lot of bullshit for you, especially from his friends.
  5. Guys have emotions, so don’t go round being a bitch, they cry too, just not over dramatically in front of their friends like you do and post it all over facebook. “Im lyk so so sad, ma bf is such a jerk!!!1!” stop that shit.
  6. They’re all scared of eyelash curlers. It’s fucking hilarious.
  7. Don’t expect him to be charming 24/7, that shits hard, unless you’re going to act like Sasha grey all the time, don’t expect him to be Hugh grant.
  8. Men gossip just as much as women do.
  9. Don’t ask whats on his mind, its either sports and boobs…..or some really deep shit that he doesn’t want to scare you off by saying. They think a lot.
  10. Don’t moan he likes to play video games if you like to do your makeup. It’s fair, if you let him sit and play fallout 2, he won’t complain you take an hour to get ready.
  11. Guys like to spoon, the reason they don’t more is ladies; YOUR HAIR GETS IN THEIR MOUTHS AND ITS GRIM. UGH. Tie it back plz.
  12. Guys go to girls for advice a lot, not other guys. 
  13. Just because he watches porn doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. 
  14. Guys like to be told they’re doing a good job as a boyfriend, same way girls like being brought flowers, buy him stuff to and do something nice.
  15. Like it or not, they will look at your boobs. It isn’t personal…just…..fuckyeahboobies.

Things guys should know about girls:

  1. Call a girl fat and she will remember it forever. I don’t mean a week or a month; I mean f o r e v e r.  
  2. It doesn’t matter how much clothes she has, she will never have anything to wear, accept this, don’t complain. It will piss her off more than you can understand.
  3. Women worry about how they look during sex, it doesn’t matter if you think she’s the most perfect woman on Earth, she’s worrying about her stomach or thighs, so don’t rip her clothes off unless she’s cool with it, sometimes we like to keep our tops on.
  4. We don’t understand our periods either.
  5.   If you say the words “she must be on her period” when a girl is moody….hahahaha….good luck, that’s all I’m saying. The heat you’re in then will be hotter than Mordor.
  6. We mark our territory through bobby pins and hair ties. If you find an abundance of these around your flat/apartment, you have a girlfriend, deal with it.
  7. Pay attention to how she looks, if she’s changed her hair. FUCKING MENTION IT. All women like it when a guy notices the little things and even more so if it’s a compliment.
  8.   A clitorious is there for a reason, fucking do something with it.
  9. We really like Oprah and Jeremy Springer etc, because we like knowing other peoples business…also occasionally, it makes us feel better about ourselves.
  10. Even when a girl looks effortless, they’ve put in a lot of effort.
  11. Seriously, this is important, girls have stomach hair, nipple hair, public hair, armpit hair, leg hair, upper lip hair and mono-brows…..waxing isn’t fun, nor is shaving or tweezing, so appreciate the fact they do all this for you while you’re sat there with your jungle hair everywhere, at least trim for fuck sake, women take hygiene seriously.
  12.  Listen to how a girls day is, you don’t have to give her advice, just listen, literally you’re more likely to get laid if you know what mood she’s in.
  13.  Ask for anal first you morons, or I will personally shove my stiletto up your ass, deal?
  14.  tell her when you’re hanging out with other girls, she won’t be so stressed if she knows you’re with a girl compared to if you don’t tell her and she finds out.
  15. No matter how much a girl says “its not important” , it is, so when she says valentines is stupid and romance isn’t important. IT IS A LIE. Make sure you get her a gift, girls deep down all like romance.

THIS TOOK ME FUCKING FOREVER TO WRITE, SO READ IT MOTHERFUCKERS.  and here’s is a completely unrelated gif for you all.


Tagged: #personal #girl #guy #man #woman #dating #facts #must read #lol

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